The full responsibility for ensuring this event takes place falls primarily on the parents and then on the church. Children should grow up with positive expectations that their parents and their faith community will create and nurture. This team (parents and church) must provide and strive for the spiritual education of all children in the congregation, from birth until they reach spiritual maturity. However, the ceremony itself should rest on the shoulders of the youth.

How can this be? Quite simply, the youth should manage the budget given by their parents (beginning with tithing their equivalent) and choose the elements they will need to demonstrate their maturity. Of course, this does not mean they will be left entirely to their own decisions, as they are not yet capable (since the ceremony has not concluded), but rather their parents and mentors will evaluate what they design and make suggestions to remove or incorporate details. Depending on how the youth faces each challenge, this preparation process will indicate their spiritual maturity for life.

One commandment is particularly associated with Bar/Bat Mitzvah: Devotional time, which is why Lord Jesus called it “the foremost commandment” (Dt 6:4-8; Mk 12:28-34). During the ceremony, they should explain why and how they perform supplications, prayers, petitions, thanksgivings, and Scripture readings. This commandment will organize the rest of the ceremony because when they decide to be baptized, they will become part of the congregation with access, even, to its leadership. A person who does not know or undervalues devotional life may have concerns about what their faith community does or does not do, but is truly immature to be part of the decisions. That’s why it’s so important to educate them in this area; they must learn to nurture their spiritual life, as well as that of their church.

The best time to start the ceremony is the Shacharit service on Shabbat, where they will be called up (Aliyah) first and then have the opportunity to share their joy with the congregation and all those planned (refreshments). The fact that the weekly services are governed by a portion allows the child to prepare for the selected day’s Bible reading, prayer, and necessary words for the ceremony. Everything ends with the same words from their father or mentor, with which God also recognized His Son at a similar ceremony: “You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased” (Mk 1:11). In the case of a Bar Mitzvah, the young person will also have the responsibility to give thanks for the bread and wine at the end of the service, while if it is a Bat Mitzvah, the young woman will give thanks for the nerot (candles) at the family table, when the Shabbat is being opened, and where there must be some witnesses (guests).

The youth are not only recognized and approved by the declaration of the father, but at the end of the service during the reception, they may receive gifts. And although anything can be gifted, it must be understood that in a spiritual ceremony, some gifts are more important than others. Since from here on out, they become volunteers for obligations with God, the most appropriate gifts should be those that help them fulfill this desire. For example:

• A study Bible.
• A Tallit.
• Tefillin.
• Nerot.
• Tzedakah for their offerings.
• A testimony book of God’s work.
• Some money.

Author: Dr. Liber Aguiar